And the journey begins ...
I want to sincerely thank you guys for the love you showed me on yesterday's post via comments and facebook messages. I convinced myself to open up and be honest about my personal struggles because I know I'm not alone in the way that I feel. But even though I knew I couldn't possibly be the only girl on the planet who was insecure and doubting herself, it still comforted me to read your notes. :)
So thanks, you guys rock.
If I had the financial means to host another blog give-away, I totally would and I would give all of you something awesome.
I intended to start brainstorming ways to get in touch with the real Courtney (<--- everything sounds dirty to me) while I waited to fall asleep last night, but, due to the eleventy billion FARTleks Mandy drug me through, I passed out instantly and didn't have time to form a thought after my head hit the pillow.
And work today was a complete blur. As soon as I got to the office I had to run to the department meeting that ended up lasting over an hour. Then a vendor came in from out of town and we all went out to lunch which took over an hour as well. Considering I only work 5 hours a day, I didn't have time to get anything done and was literally sweating when I left because I felt so rushed.
Immediately after work I hit the trail and had the most horrific 4 mile run I've ever had in my entire life. It wasn't my slowest time, but it was definitely the most painful workout I've encountered during training. I ignored my instincts to take the day off after interval training yesterday, but of course I didn't listen to myself. I could literally hear my thighs mocking me as I huffed and puffed along outside today, too exhausted to hold my head up. They seemed to be saying, Told ya so. Told ya so. Chub rub. Told ya so. Told ya so.
The second I got back from my run I took a speedy shower and then drove across town to meet one of my gal pal's for a painting session at Latest Glaze. I ended up painting a bowl a light shade of blue with red trim and little cherries on it. But, like most craft projects, the idea looked way cuter in my head and something got lost in translation between my brain and my hand because it ended up looking like a blue bowl with red boobs painted on the side.
After painting and catching up with my friend, I rushed over to the mall to woefully return a beautiful cheetah print silk dress that I bought on a day when I had accidentally mistaken myself for Carrie Bradshaw. It was SUCH a cute dress, but the elastic in the waist band was funky and it was almost borderline scandalous in the length department. Not only do I not have the legs to wear a dress like that, I simply don't have a lifestyle conducive to wearing such a garment. There's absolutely no where I could wear it other than a fancy dinner. And Clayton's and my idea of a fancy dinner is Bub's Burgers.
But my gosh, the dress was SO cute.
So now I'm home, sitting on the couch, typing this entry and trying to ignore Constantine singing "Unchained Melody" on American Idol because he's not singing so much as screeching.
Ha, Ryan Seacrest is so small.
Anyway, I haven't been able to squeeze in much of anything today. I'm not exactly sure how to approach my new adventure of self-discovery (again, that sounds perverted), but I have a few ideas. I'm going to try some new things and revisit some old passions of mine in an attempt to get more familiar with what brings me joy. I'm certainly going to try to update my blog more often because I absolutely love writing it, and I'm a complete word nerd. :) I think that I'm going to introduce more pictures into the blog and maybe even some of my stupid doodles from Adobe Illustrator to give this site more personality. So, I sincerely hope you'll keep reading and hold me accountable to my goals!
That being said, what are some things that I really enjoy doing?
Well, there's writing.
And cooking ... yeah, I definitely want to put more effort into cooking.
Good start. Let's go from there. :)