On Sunday morning, my good friend Maria sent me a text to tell me that she had a crazy half marathon dream in which she couldn't find a parking spot and missed the start of the race. This struck a major chord with me because I suffer from some pretty bizarre stress dreams in the weeks leading up to big races.
These dreams are so commonplace for me, I never thought they were wroth mentioning. However, Maria's text inspired me to share some of my most memorable dreams with Clayton, and he quickly confirmed that they're weird and that I'm weird.
And a lot of them involve Oprah.
Never in my half marathon stress dreams have I ever finished the actual race. Sometimes the dreams start in the moments leading up to the start of the race, but most of the time I suddenly find myself in the middle of the half marathon, trying desperately to get to the finish line.
One of the landscapes from my dreams follows me from year to year. I find it both strange and quite fascinating that I've run the same half marathon course in more than one dream and I recognize it as the same course because it's not an average, every day road race. It's my understanding that roads paved with blue hills and rainbow clouds aren't that common.
Sometimes my stress dreams are majorly well, stressful. Especially the week before I ran my first full marathon and dreamed that the race took place on a circular indoor track and if you lost count of your laps, you had to start over.
I've also run several half marathons in Oprah's backyard. So many races in fact, I'm considering calling the woman herself and asking her if she has a ball pit filled with hamsters because I sure as heck have been in it if she does.
Also, several of my races have obstacles .... like ball pits filled with hamsters.
And trying to run through a library while being really, really quiet because ya know, a library.
One of the worst dreams I've ever had was when I was super late getting to a race and it took me forever to pick up my race bib. When I finally got through registration and made it to the starting line (which was actually a tunnel slide and pretty darn awesome now that I think about it), I realized I wasn't wearing any shoes.
Clearly I'm not the only one who has stress dreams about running. I actually have stress dreams about a lot of things (the month before my wedding was horrible! I dreamed that 20 girls showed up to be my bridesmaids instead of 4 and I had to have them fight for a spot American Gladiators style). I still have a reoccurring dream that I'm in college, finishing my final semester before graduation and I suddenly realize that there was a class on my schedule that I never, ever went to.
This mirror is pretty, but I get mad every time I look at it.
Fun fact about yours truly: I hate throwing away money. I mean, I'm sure that no one actually likes watching money go down the drain, but knowing that I've wasted precious dollar bills can send me into a blind rage.
Example: Sometimes I look in my closet and am disgusted with myself when I start adding up how much moola I've dropped on clothes that I stopped wearing after a few months. This is exactly why you should never invest good money in fleeting trends. Buy trendy items cheap and focus on classic pieces that never go out of style. Classic pieces, people!
But I digress ...
At the of the winter Clay and I focused on a few small home projects, one being to replace the mirror in our guest bathroom. We already painted the walls, replaced the vanity light and purchased a sassy new soap pump, so why not add a stylish framed mirror to really tie everything together?
We found a white framed mirror that we really liked at Menard's (if you don't have a Menard's in your area, it's a home improvement store that's slightly less expensive than Lowe's or Home Depot), but it was $70 and way more than we were wanting to spend at the time. The other home improvement stores didn't have anything cheaper that we liked, so we went to Wal-Mart as a last ditch effort.
We found a comparable mirror of the same size, but for only $30. It was a bronze mirror, but Clayton is really good at painting and said he could paint it white in absolutely no time. Including the cost of spray paint, we spent a total of $35 and were feeling pretty smug about our thriftiness.
But we were a little surprised when we got home and discovered that the wall mirror (I can't emphasize the wall part enough) didn't have any mounts attached to um, hang it on the wall. Freakin' Wal-Mart.
Luckily my husband's hella handy and after doing a beautiful job of panting the mirror, he installed mounts and wiring so we could hang that puppy up in our bathroom.
It looked fantastic!
Until it fell down the first time.
And then the second time.
And then the third time.
It's the darnest thing: The wall mirror is too heavy to actually hang on the wall! In fact, this wall mirror is so poorly equipped to live life on a wall the mounts actually ripped off the back of the mirror. It is 100% completely un-hangable. The wall mirror rejects the wall.
And we can't return the bronze mirror because the bronze mirror is now white.
After the mirror ripped off the wall for the third time, I had to excuse myself to go outside and kick grass for a few minutes because I couldn't even deal. (It's a good thing that Wal-Mart sells cotton balls and deodorant for cheap or I would vow to never set foot in there again.)
So we ended up going back to Menard's to buy the original framed white mirror for $70. But now instead of only spending $70, we actually spent $105 in total and ...
... I can't ...
... I can't even ...
Does anyone want a gently used wall mirror that forgot how to be a wall mirror?
Goodness, it's been awhile since I've done one of these.
1.) One of the downsides of having the reputation of being afraid of giant squid is that ... people know you're afraid of giant squid. This means that my social media feed is a steady stream of "Hey, Courtney! Have you pooped your pants yet today? No? Get ready!" And if you don't think I suffer a mini stroke every time you tag me in one of these pictures, you're only kidding yourself and are completely underestimating my phobia.
AND WHY DO SQUIDS EVEN HAVE BEAKS!?!?!?!?! They're not BIRDS. WAIT. WHAT IF THEY'RE EVOLVING INTO BIRDS!?!?!
2.) I made the decision to sell my beloved Garmin Forerunner 205 GPS watch in favor of getting something slightly newer. The 205 has a lot of bells and whistles that I never took full advantage of and when I saw an incredible price on one of their new models, I just couldn't pass it up. I've become so meticulous about my running statistics that I'm now one of those crazy people that sees a major value in buying a watch with slightly better GPS capabilities.
So it was with a very heavy heart that I posted my "for sale" ad, but I'm happy to report that my watch's new home will be with a gal I've known since preschool and who will definitely love Speedy as much as I did. We went on one final run this evening before I hand him off tomorrow.
Ugh, my eyes just welled with tears. I am SUCH a sap. In fact, I still get emotional when I think about my Pontiac G6 being scrapped for parts.
You can read about the beginning of Speedy's and my relationship here (And look at my old "Courtney Confessions" graphic! Ha ha ha ha ha Glad to see that my design skills have improved since then. Barely, but a little ...)
3.) I'm not handling my impending 30th birthday with nearly as much grace or dignity as I'd hoped. I know that everyone's getting older, and it's not just me, but that does very little to assuage my anxiety. Age is just a number, but that number still says, "You're no spring chicken", and the rapid passing of time keeps me awake at night.
That last confession was some heavy sh*t. Sorry.
So how's this for my final confession:
4.) One of my favorite things about the human experience is that each couple has a unique set of relationship quirks. For example, if Clay or I use a fancy word whilst in the middle of a heated argument, the other person will literally stop the conversation to say, "OMG. Good for you!" before continuing the fight. I think this speaks volumes not only about our general weirdness, but also points to the fact that our arguments are never really that serious if we can easily pause to compliment each other's vocabulary. What odd things do you and your significant other do?
Imagine my surprise (and pure embarrassment) when I awoke on Easter Sunday thinking, "He's risen!" only to discover that I seriously strained or pulled a muscle in my butt cheek the previous day while BOWLING.
That's right, I hurt myself ... bowling.
I bowled so hard, I injured my butt. And I didn't even bowl well. In fact, I bowled terribly. How sad is that? I hurt myself trying to come in last place.
But it was totally worth it.
Clayton and I switch which side of the family we spend the holidays with and this year was his parents' turn to host us on Easter Sunday, so we spent Saturday up in Greenwood with my mom, sister and boyfriend.
We went bowling (where I unwittingly pulled my buttocks), had a cookout with brats on the grill, and all decided to challenge ourselves and see how much chocolate we could consume in one afternoon (which is a game that everybody wins).
And I'm not gonna lie, I totally outdid myself on my Easter cake presentation this year. LOOK AT ALL THE BUNNIES!!!!!!
I have a new favorite buttercream icing recipe that I half invented (because I'm half smart) and it's pure gold. It covered the cake like a a dreamy cloud of sugary butter, but was sturdy and unmoving. And the taste? Yowza!
Oh my gosh, why does my face look so unbelievably greasy?
Does cake really make me sweat that much? Holy moly!
On Sunday I put an Easter basket full of chocolate in front of Clayton's face to wake him because there can never be enough candy in the house. "Oh no!" he cried groggily. "I didn't even think to get you anything."
"That's why I bought the giant chocolate bunny. Just give me half of it and we'll be even," I replied.
See? I think these things out.
I started my day with a gorgeous 3.5 mile walk in the sunshine. My body was still recovering from Saturday's 8-mile run (and bowling, apparently), so a nice stroll is just what I needed.
Speaking of Saturday's 8-mile run: It was amazing. I had so much energy that my last three miles were all in the low 8s. If I wasn't in a hurry to head north to see my mom, I probably could have cranked out another 3 or 4 miles easily! Praying this momentum carries over to race day!
We spent Easter afternoon with Clayton's immediate and extended family at his grandmother's house and enjoyed yummy food and excellent company! Afterwards, Clay and I hit the grocery store for the week (we have a pot roast finishing up in the Crock-Pot right as we speak!) and took Joey for an early evening walk. The weather was still so lovely and we were enjoying each other's company so much, we ended up walking 5 miles! Yup, that made Sunday's walking total 8.5 miles for me.
No wonder my butt hurts today.
Fact: I said "butt" 4 times in a post about Easter.